Sunday, August 19, 2007

Human For Now

My infection has now officially been cleared up (at least, that is what the docs are assuming because they hit me with such heavy duty antibiotics and my blood didn't grow any critters to tell them exactly what we were dealing with). So, Wednesday, I'll go to get a mediport installed. I only have a few more chemo treatments left, so my chemo doc was reluctant to get a port put in instead of another PICC. I told him that my anxiety about that is so bad that I'll need to be knocked out for that. He said that he can't guarentee that that could happen except with a port. I told him that's what I want anyway. Since it is a surgical procedure, I will at least have a twilight-type of anesthesia. Then, I will resume my chemo. The chemo doc was upseat that I missed this week and last week. He told me that I shouldn't have missed it this week. I told him that when I was in the hospital, he told me I couldn't have chemo again until my infection was totally cleared and that I just finished my antibiotic that morning (Friday). He acted annoyed and said that the infection would have been cleared before I was done with the antibiotics and that I should have called him. That annoyed me because he knew I was in the hospital with an infection. He even saw me in the hospital. He didn't say anything about starting chemo before the antibiotics are done, only once I was cleared of infection. How was I supposed to know that they were not one in the same? Anyway, I'll resume chemo probably Thursday.

Then, Friday, I go to the hospital to have a stint inserted into my cervix so that the internal radiation can start. The stint will be a tube shaped piece that will keep my cervix open so that the radiation can get inside (I think a wire is inserted for the treatments). I will get 6 internal treatments. The radiation doc said that the first time, they will give me morphine. Gee, that made me feel better (NOT). I'm guessing that it will be even worse than I imagined if they have to give me morphine. These 6 treatments will probably take about 2 weeks to complete. The radiation doc said that the first one is the worst and that the second one isn't as bad, the third and fourth are less painful and by the time I'm done, the last ones are "a piece of cake". Yeah, like I believe that. It's easy for him to say, he isn't the one getting cauterized from the inside out.

But for now, I don't have any nausea because I'm off of the antibiotics and chemo. I don't have any wires or tubes sticking out from my arm, so essentially I'm free for the next few days to live an almost normal life. Tomorrow, Deb and I are going to Grand Rapids to visit a friend. Monday, I'm going to another friend's to drum. So, for now, I feel like a regular human being, but I miss work (surprise). I'm having to find ways to entertain myself for now. The dogs and cats are helpful in that regard.


  1. Aimee, this is Kate, from church. I just want you to know that I'm thinking about you, and amazed that you are able to share this tough time in your life with us. I give you big props...hoping to see you soon.


  2. Aimee, dear,

    Thank you for sharing these steps on your journey. I get angry reading much of this, angry that is the opposite of the impossible hope I felt when I left the theater, weeping, after "Sicko." I can't believe the blaming and indifference of this medical system--and, of cousre, the homophobia, sexism, anti-big-bodyism, etc. I'm so glad that you know your beauty and worth.

    Did I tell you you inspired me? I decided to finally get my blogspot blog up and running. Take a peek, when you care to, at CoffeeCabinet.

    Big hugs to you and Deb. You are in my prayers each morning. XOXOX DCO